Tuesday, September 25, 2007

'Not My Business'

Have you ever found yourself in a position where you have to watch someone handling a situation in completely and totally the wrong way?

I'm talking about the kind of situation were you're watching a friend make a really bad mistake, or they're 'solving' a problem in a way that's just going to cause bigger problems down the road...or, worst of all, watching them stand by and let bad things happen because they want to avoid a confrontation.

It's like watching a parent buy more and more stuff for a terminally spoiled child to stop them from throwing a temper tantrum. It's stops the screaming now, but all it's doing is reinforcing the idea that all the kid has to do is scream to get what they want.

...but the problem is, the situation doesn't involve you directly.

Then, you just know if you try to offer advice all it's going to do is cause and argument and strain your relationship...and they won't take your advice anyway.

That absolute worst thing is when you find a friend in trouble, and they completely and totally ignore every bit of advice you give them...right up to the point that someone else offers them exactly the same advice and they accept it without question.

6 comments:

MC Etcher said...

Dude! If there's something you need to tell me, just do it! Honest!

delmer said...

Has my ex-roommate (from 20-years ago)moved into your neighborhood?

We had a situation in which I was giving him sound advice that he happily ignored.

Shortly after that another friend offered the same advice. My roomie paused, thought for a second, said, "You think so?" and accepted the advice as if it was the smartest thing he'd ever heard.

OzzyC said...

Yeah, that can be frustrating. At least the friend finally listened though.

Paulius said...

Actually, this post covers about 3 different people.

One of which I've given the same advice to over and over again, only to watch them continue on that same self-destructive path...I'm starting to think this one is purposely self sabotaging their life.

The second person, I can't say anything to because they won't listen and it'll just cause an argument.

The third and final person it REALLY is none of my business, and I can't tell someone else how to live their life, even if totally disagree with how they handle things.

Sunny said...

Hmmmm.... I highly suspect the second person is myself....

and I suspect that I know who the 1st person is as well......

I love you dear....for letting me be me and handle things my way...even if you can see things clearer than I do.

Don't think I don't see my failings...I do- but sometimes, you do things that don't make sense for crazy reasons.

XXX

Marie said...

I can honestly say that your advice is probably welcome from anyone who knows you. And that sometimes as much as you may want to theres simply nothing you can do.