Monday, September 10, 2007

Bite me.

Have you evern noticed that the world is split into three types of people?

I have. These three groups are Givers, Traders and Takers.

All of these a pretty self explanatory. The Givers will give and help out with absolutely no thought of reward or payment. The Traders (where most of us fall) are happy to give, but expect something in return. The Takers just take and take, never give anything back, and are the first people to kick up a stink when they don’t get their own way.

I like to think of myself as a Giver-Trader hybrid. If you need something, and it’s in my power to provide it, I generally will. On the other hand, while I don’t keep a tally of what people owe me, if I need your help, and I’ve helped you in the past…I’m gonna get pissed if you refuse to return the favor for no good reason.

For example, my best bud back in England was a perfect example of the way things should be done. Like all friends do we lent each other money, but neither of us kept track of who owed who what. The way we figured is that in the grand scheme of things, we’re going to end up even.

Long story short, neither one of us minded handing over the odd ten or twenty bucks, because we knew if we were short next week, the other would help out.

Fellow blogging friends MC Etcher and Cindy are also prime examples of a Givers. Within months of ‘meeting’ them (online that is) they sent Sunny and I a bunch of Gamecube games and books. Generosity, plain and simple.

Another of my friends, who I ended up pretty much cutting off all contact with, was the prime example of a taker. He was the kind of guy who will put his order in every time someone heads to the bar, and not buy a drink all night. Then he’d throw a freaking tantrum if you asked him for a cigarette.

The worst part about him was he’d turn up to a party uninvited, help himself to everything everyone had brought, head to the bar with you, drink for free all night…and then brag about how drunk he got the next day without spending any money.

Basically, that was when I stopped being friends with him. He’d turned up to a family celebration uninvited, and every time someone went to the bar for their round (bear in mind that 90% of the people there didn’t even know him) he’d place his order. Not just a beer like everyone else, but the most expensive drink he could think of.

When it was his turn, he handed me two bucks and said “Get one of yourself as well”. When I pointed out that he hadn’t given me enough for a single beer, and that there were about 8 people in the round…he threw a fit. He said “Why should I buy any of them a drink? I don’t know them!”

I should have pointed out that they’d been buying his drinks all night, drinks that cost on average two or three times more than everyone else’s. That if we were playing it like that, he probably owed me free drinks for a couple of years. That the people ‘he didn’t know’ had been buying his triple Jack Daniels all night.

Instead I just told him to get the fuck out and lose my phone number. I was tired of him embarrassing me in front of everyone.

Well, by now you’re probably wondering what made me think about this today…and the fact of the matter is that 90% of the people I come into contact with are Takers, plain and simple…and I’m getting sick of it.

Online and off, I help people out, and I’m tired of fair-weather friends. People who are my best bud when they want something from me, and ‘Pauli who?” when they don’t. People who plain ignore me day-to-day, but will contact me after a six-month absence because they need something. The people who don’t say thank you, and 99 times out of a hundred, that’s all I ask.

Well, I hate to say it, but the store’s closed. The free tech-support hotline has closed down. The favor machine been unplugged and Mr. Nice Guy has gone on hiatus.

To the Takers out there, and you know who you are, I dare you to ask me for a favor. I just freaking dare you. When all I ask for is a simple thank you, I think you’ve all got a fucking cheek.


manda said...

You seem very angry lately.. and I gave too!!!

Saffyre said...

Yikes, somebody p*ssed you off!!

Paulius said...

Mandy - Yes I am very angry lately, can you tell :-) I also wrote a whole blog post on the stuff you sent me for my definately deserve the title of "Giver"

Saffy - Yes someone did. Only something little that I'd usually just say "pffft!" and forget about, but it the straw that broke the camel's back.

OzzyC said...

... and the takers can ruin it for the givers and traders as well.

Yesterday, someone asked me a computer question and eventually asked if I'd look at his PC. I told him no and explained that I've been burned one too many times.

MC Etcher said...

Ouch! Perhaps Takers could be tattooed in some way, so we can see them coming.

Marie said...

Im sorry your so are a very generous person and that sometimes gets taken advantage of. Well, I appreciate everything you've ever done for us and hope you know it.

Paulius said...

Marie - In case you're worried, I'm not talking about you and Frank. Frank's helped me fix stuff, worked on the car etc more times than I can count.

Hell, I don't even mind going out of my way as long as people actually say "Thank you"

Marie said...

i wasn't worried, I just wanted to make you feel a little better. Ya'll have been good to us.