Twilight

With everyone going so apeshit over 'Twilight', including my darling wife, I finally decided to read the first book.

I didn't really know what to expect. You see, I laughed at all the adults who read Harry Potter and made fun of my dad mercilessly when he bought Goblet of Fire to see what all the fuss was about. Then, I gave it a go and before I knew it, it was 3am and I was going to read 'just one more chapter' before going to bed.

Twilight…wasn't like that.

I got to the end of the first book and realized something:

I'd just read an unpopular teenage girl's masturbation fantasy.

Now, there's not really anything wrong with that…we all love a bit of escapism now and again…but I don't understand how a book that is, at best, a teenager's guilty pleasure could become such a worldwide phenomenon.

Oh, and vampires don't sparkle in the sun. Period.

Twilight

With everyone going so apeshit over 'Twilight', including my darling wife, I finally decided to read the first book.

I didn't really know what to expect. You see, I laughed at all the adults who read Harry Potter and made fun of my dad mercilessly when he bought Goblet of Fire to see what all the fuss was about. Then, I gave it a go and before I knew it, it was 3am and I was going to read 'just one more chapter' before going to bed.

Twilight…wasn't like that.

I got to the end of the first book and realized something:

I'd just read an unpopular teenage girl's masturbation fantasy.

Now, there's not really anything wrong with that…we all love a bit of escapism now and again…but I don't understand how a book that is, at best, a teenager's guilty pleasure could become such a worldwide phenomenon.

Oh, and vampires don't sparkle in the sun. Period.

In which I call Shenanigans

I've spent the past couple of days reading the nutrition information on food labels very carefully.

It is now time to call shenanigans on a massive scale.

I mean, the food and drink industry has always tried to fool us to make their stuff seem more attractive. For example, if you're feeling good about yourself because you're eating a fat free yoghurt, I suggest you take a look at the sugar content. Basically anything labeled as 'fat free' is loaded with sugar and anything labeled 'sugar free' is probably loaded with fat.

Well, I noticed something else. They use serving size so they can lie on the nutritional information.

Basically, if you have a candy bar that's 500 calories, you just say that the single, small candy bar is actually five servings… which means you can put 'Just 100 calories!" right on the label.

For example, today I bought a Coca Cola Zero, the main selling point of which is that it supposedly has zero calories, sugar, fat and everything else. I checked the label while waiting in line and found that a 16 ounce bottle of Coke Zero is supposed to be two servings. There's only about four or five decent-sized mouthfuls in the whole bottle!

Now, while I don't really think this is something to be outraged about…it's be nice if food companies weren't allowed to manipulate the nutrition info like that, especially considering it can be a little dangerous.

I wonder how many diabetics have eaten something thinking there was a safe amount of sugar or starches in something only to discover later that the two cookies they ate actually constituted five or six 'servings'?