Tuesday, April 03, 2007


You know, I actually try to keep this blog a little upbeat. You know, the occasional funny post, a weird thought that comes to me…but it seems the world is just doing everything it can to piss me off.

This latest little nugget is especially annoying, because it comes from the city I was born in, namely Liverpool in England.

Ok, are you ready for the earth-shattering news?

A ten year old schoolboy called a fellow student a “Gay boy” in an email!

Ok, I’ll give you a couple of minutes to let that sink in. I know it’s an astounding announcement, and you’ll need a few moments to recover. I apologize for shattering the illusion of safety you may have built up around yourself and exposed you to the cold, hard real world where abominations like this can happen. Go get yourself some warm milk and a blankie and you’ll feel better. There there.

Seriously though, you’re probably thinking the same thing I did when I saw that headline. Namely “Who cares? What’s so unusual about school kids swapping insults?”

In any sane world, the teacher takes kid to one side, tells him not to do it again, and maybe gives them lines or makes them stay in during break-time. In fact, in a really sane world, the kid just writes back “No, you’re gay!” and we never hear about it.

Unfortunately, this isn’t a sane world.

What actually happened was this kid got a visit from two police officers.

Since when is two ten year olds swapping insults a matter for the police? What possible reason could there be to get the police involved? Sure, if the kid beat the other to within an inch of his life, or threatened to bring a gun or a knife to school…then I could at least understand getting the police involved.

Back when I was at school, if a parent called the police because some ten year old called their ten year old a ‘gay boy’, they would have been laughed off the phone line. Chances are they’d have found themselves on the receiving end of some charges for wasting police time.

Unfortunately, times have changed, and an insulting email gets a pre-teen a visit from the police who say “This is a very serious offense”.

This is honestly making me despair for the whole human race. I mean, seriously, what the fuck is going on when a schoolyard spat ends in the police being called.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. School isn’t just about receiving a normal education. It’s about receiving a social education as well. School is where kids learn to deal with problems, including bullies and assholes. What lesson are we teaching kids if we get the police involved over something so mind-numbingly minor?

Seriously, in ten years, this kid is going to get job, make a mistake and his boss will chew him out…and he’ll burst into tears, run home and call the police because his boss was mean.

“Hello (sob) police? My boss said I was (sob) stupid! I want him arrested for being a big meanie! Waaaaaaaaah!”

...and the saddest thing is, the police probably will get involved. It won’t be long before ‘Not Being Nice’, ‘Being A Big Meanie’ and the ‘Playing Nice Act of 2010” make it onto the law books.

How about leaving the police out of things, you know, try something radical and ‘out there’…like waiting until an actual crime has taken place before calling them?


Kato said...

It does seem like taking matters too far to get the police involved. But this story goes perfectly with the name of your blog, so there's that.

Since you wanted upbeat, how about this clip from the Daily Show about Iran and Great Britain. It pokes a little fun at your homeland, but it's all set up for the punchline.

Saffyre said...

It's enough to make me immigrate!

A friend of mine has a visit from the cops because he sent an email to someone at our old place of work which referred to our old boss as "the irish witch". Apparently she was distraught as the racist and religious slur!!!

manda said...

You know if someone made a racist comment, or any other negative slur, the last thing I would do, is call the cops, cause those bastards all seem to be the most racist/agree with all the negative stereotypes.. and use it!! they're assholes!... :X

Sunny said...

I take exception to that comment manda- lol- I used to be a cop and I'm certainly not racist- and only a VERY small percentage of cops are that racist.

I do agree that the ones that are racist are extremely agressive and vocal about it tho.