Saturday, August 22, 2009

Paranoid much?

In my lifetime I have seen some pretty idiotic things and heard some really ridiculous ideas and theories, but this one takes the cake:

I got this in an email forward today.

If you can't or don't want to watch it, it's basically a short animation where someone dials up for pizza and the animation shows the order-taker's 'computer screen', which pulls up a crazy amount of information about the guy. For example, he orders two extra-meat pizzas and apparently the person taking the order can pull up his medical records and says he can only order those pizzas if he agrees to sign a waiver from his medical insurance company…then he complains about the price, the person sees he's just ordered two plane tickets to Hawaii, so he can't be short of cash, etc, etc.

Then, at the end, there's a 'take action' button, where you can go and sign a petition against the idea of a national ID card…because of course, if there's suddenly a national ID card, we'll be living in a 'Big Brother' surveillance society where anyone can know anything about you at any time for any reason. If we get a national ID card…something that anyone who drives a car essentially carries already, the teenagers at Domino's Pizza will have the sort of unrestricted access to your records that even the CIA and FBI don't have.

I say that if you believe that, you're one step away from wearing a tin-foil hat so the satellites can't steal your dreams.

You see, we already have a national ID card. It's called your drivers' license and your social security card. I hate to be the one to point this out, but if you're worried about 'them' knowing everything you do, you're about ten years too late. Worried that an ID card will let the government know exactly what you earn and spend, with the ability to gain access to your bank records without your consent? Oh shit! I bet they'll have some really scary name like, I dunno, The IRS?

Let me explain something. Let's say the government was this big shadowy evil organization that for some unknown reason wanted to spy on you…do you really think they'd need a national ID card accomplish it?

This really is the domain of idiots who live in a fantasy world. People who argue against ID cards, but happily pull out their drivers license every time they need to cash a check, buy alcohol…oh, and did you think you needed to give your social security number when you applied for your license just for fun?

The thing that really makes this laughable? The kinds of idiots who take this shit seriously are also the same people demanding something be done about the illegal immigrants and terrorists. We should be able to instantly identify American citizens, but they shouldn't have to carry any form of ID. They're the same people who scream that airport security should keep weapons off planes and then complain when they have to wait an extra half hour before they can board. They want crime at zero but don't want pay for extra police and really don't want surveillance cameras.

The longer I live, the more I'm convinced that the majority of people are ill-informed, selfish, reactionary, nimby morons of sub-par intelligence who want to have their cake and eat it too.

I mean, why apply a second's rational thought when you can just shout really loudly about things you don't understand?


Evan 08 said...

Your last couple of paragraphs sums it up very well... can't have it both ways.

I really think that big brother is here, but it's not just the government, it's also big business. It's not about power, it's about money.

Unfortunately, I'm realistic enough to understand what I'd have to give up in order to escape big brother, and I like my conveniences.

Paulius said...

Oh I agree that 'big brother' is's just that there's a huge difference between stores keeping track of what what customer 019473 bought in order to target advertising and the government spying on you just for the hell of it.

To be honest, that's the part that makes me laugh the most. The idea that 'they' would spend the time and resources to perform 24 hour surveillance on a random person for no reason.

Personally, even as a post 9/11 immigrant, I don't think the CIA or FBI really gives a shit that I ate at Jack in the Box yesterday then came home and watched a few DVR'd episodes of Mythbusters.

I'm sure they'd care if I went and bought 20 AR-15 rifles...but I'm pretty sure that would get flagged even without a naional ID card or having a chip implanted in your brain.