Fat Bastard.

I was sitting at the computer today while Sunny was watching Oprah. Now Oprah usually gets my blood-pressure up anyway thanks to her Fox-News style approach to chat shows (forget the facts, go for the sensationalism), but what I saw today nearly had me screaming at the screen.

It was one of those shows about morbidly obese people.

There was a guy on there who was still in his teens who weighed over 800 pounds. Cue five minutes of the guy whining into a camera about how he couldn't sleep lying down, how he couldn't move and how awful his life is and how people just don't understand how hard it is to be obese.

Then, it cut to the guy's mother who cried into the camera about how hard it is to 'watch her son slowly die'…WHILE SHE FRIED A WHOLE FUCKING CHICKEN FOR HIM WITH A COUPLE OF GIGANTIC BURGERS TO CHASE THEM WITH.

The final straw was a fucking doctor going on about how obesity is a 'disease'.

NO IT FUCKING ISN'T!

Influenza is a disease, Aids is a disease. Eating 150,000 calories a day while watching TV is not a disease. It's a goddamn choice.

It honestly makes me sick to my stomach to watch this greedy asshole crying about how terrible his life is while he eats his fifteenth steak, or watch his mother claiming they've 'tried everything' while she deep-fries a whole turkey.

Here's something you haven't tried…SALAD! EXERCISE! For fuck's sake try half a fried chicken with just one burger and then walk to the mailbox and back to start.

The absolute worst thing, and the part that made me ask Sunny to change the channel before I threw the TV out of the window, was when the guy went to hospital, had his stomach stapled to make it impossible to eat…and when they interviewed him six months later and he'd lost some weight, Oprah talked to him like he was a hero and had achieved something.

You know what? Lance Armstrong achieved something. This guy just ate until he weighed well over a half-ton and was so lazy and greedy that the prospect of being dead before he turned twenty wasn't enough to motivate him to eat a few salads or go for a walk.

FUCK YOU, YOU GREEDY BASTARD!

You know what? I read all these stories about people born into awful situations, where life is a constant struggle and they pull themselves up by their bootstraps and go on to be world leaders in their fields. To see people like that, then see this greedy, selfish fucker cry into his cheeseburger because he was bullied at school and lays all the responsibility at someone else's feet because he's so misunderstood and badly done to…it honestly makes me sick.

Pretty soon we'll just stop accepting any responsibility for ourselves at all. It really pisses me off when these assholes act like they're victims when everything they're suffering is self inflicted.

I quit smoking. I haven't smoked in six months and I still have days where I want a cigarette so badly I'd be willing to saw my legs off to have someone just blow smoke in my face. However, I exercise a little self control and actually don't do something I really like for the good of my health. I chose to take responsibility for my own well-being and don't smoke even though I'd really, really like to. I'm not saying this to show how awesome I am…I'm pointing it out for the exact opposite reason…it's entirely normal. It's not a disease because you don't want to diet or exercise…and that's exactly what these fat bastards are saying.

The simple fact of the matter is that if you exercise and eat right, you'll never wake up one morning and find that you're 800lbs. You choose to eat too much and you choose not to exercise. The fact that you can choose means it's NOT A DISEASE.

So, if you're ridiculously overweight, don't sit there and cry about how unfair it is…put the burger down and go for a fucking walk.