Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Gives a Whole New Meaning to the Words 'Chicken Dance'.

Regular readers will have read about my exploits this time last week, when sleep deprivation lead to the pimped out fridge, the mango incident and the Chilly Beans song.

Last week, I basically went shopping after being up for nearly 26 hours straight.

Guess what I did again this week?

You see, I suffer from regular, inexplicable bouts of insomnia. I feel perfectly fine, no stress or worries, but then my brain just refuses to switch off. I find myself lying awake in the middle of the day (I sleep days and get up at night), feeling obnoxiously awake.

Well, this week was a little different. For about a week I’ve felt like absolute crap. Constant headache, sore throat and cough. Yup, the bug Sunny had, made its way to me.

The result of this was that yesterday I got into bed, and slept for 16 hours straight. In fact, the only reason I got up was because I looked at the clock and thought: “Holy Shit! I’ve been asleep for 16 hours!”

Guess what happens when to get out of bed 9pm after sleeping for 16 hours?

You can’t sleep for shit afterwards, that’s what.

However, I’ve discovered the upside to this problem.

When you’re high as a kite from sleep deprivation, it makes grocery shopping MUCH more interesting.

You see, your body is running on sheer will-power. Your energy, concentration and ability to form a cogent thought have just gone bye-bye. You’re running on some sort of weird, whacked out cheapo ‘energy substitute’. The stuff that kept you awake and running as a caveman when those pesky raptors wouldn’t stop chasing you.

I’ve never done drugs, but I think this might be what it feels like.

Now I would like to point out that I don’t have an American Drivers license, so the more life-endangering parts of the shopping were handled by Sunny. (The driving, in other words).

Let’s just say that grocery shopping usually involves trudging around a supermarket, keeping track of prices and all out boredom.

Grocery shopping on 26 hours without sleep involves me saying to my Wife:

“What are you looking at me like that for? Haven’t you ever seen an English guy singing the words ‘Cheese on Toast’ to the tune of “Got my Mind Set on You” by George Harrison?”

Oh, one last thing:

Chicka chicka chicka chicka chickeeeeeeeeeeen! Chicka chicka chicka chicka chickeeeeeeeeen!  -  The shopping cart wobbly-wheel mantra (Used only when buying chicken.)


MC Etcher said...

Oh that Paulius, he's a crazy one.

Kato said...

I might have to try that. I despise grocery shopping, and the idea of anything that would make it more amusing is definitely appealing.