Sunday, November 18, 2007

Simsalabim!

Since I started blogging I’ve written more posts on stupid people, gullible people, reactionaries and band-wagon jumpers than I can count.

It’s time for one more.

Checking on today’s news I read a story about a woman in Cyprus who tried to charge a man $12,000 for ‘breaking a curse’ for him. The guy didn’t want to pay, so he went to the police and now the woman’s on trial for sorcery.

Ok, let me just check the calendar…

Yep, it’s 2007, not 1707…I mean, come on! Sorcery? Haven’t we established by now that magic isn’t real?

Of course, it’s easy to laugh at those wacky foreigners, but when you consider there’s a major ‘movement’ in the USA trying to get the Harry Potter books taken for the shelves for teaching our kids ‘witchcraft’, you really have to stop and think for a minute.

Let’s use a bit of logic, shall we?

If there was a such thing as magic, and I mean real magic, we’d be living in one big dictatorship. If I was on trial for sorcery, it’d go like this:

“How do you plead?”

(Big flash of light)

“There you go judge, enjoy living the rest of your life as a frog.”

BLAMMO!

“Mr Prosecutor, from now on all your descendants will be born with very small dicks…and that includes the girls.”

SWOOOOSH!

“Well, now these handcuffs are taken care of, and your side-arms have all been replaced with poisonous snakes… does anyone else feel like putting me on trial for sorcery? No? Didn’t think so. I’ll be off. Oh, and the court owes me 50 million in damages for besmirching my good name.”

Isn’t it amazing that all the witches and sorcerors that have been put on trial throughout our history have all had amazingly powerful evil magic…that somehow just doesn’t work on prison cell locks or on the people that accuse them?

Magic isn’t real.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

sorcery is realy, and so is black magic,i belive that If bush can get elected twice then anything is possible. I suppose that science is your evidence against magic, but you should consisder that science is still in its infancy. Theres a lot out there that we dont understand yet, and probally never will.

ps. did you here about the guy in india who maried a dog. He did it because of the bad fortune he had after stonning two dogs 15 years ago.

Paulius said...

You sir, are a fucking idiot.

I suppose you COULD say that 'science' is 'my evidence against magic'...but only because science lines up with common freaking sense.

In fact, why am I even bothering replying to you?

The Girl said...

That is because they didn't use the correct magic words from Sesame Street..

A la peanut butter sandwiches....

THEN it would have worked!

~TG