Wednesday, December 16, 2009

An open letter to the world.

Hi, my name's Paulius.

I'm one of the approximate 6 billion people sharing this planet with you, and there's less than a 50/50 chance that if we met, we'd like each other enough to voluntarily spend time with each other.

You see, thanks to where I was born, my upbringing, the things I was taught and the decisions and judgements I've made over my lifetime, I have a particular view of the world and the way people should behave.

For example, I have no problem with Gay marriage because I have gay friends and I'm sane enough to realize that two gay men or women officially being recognized as a couple isn't the end of the world. I have an almost unique view of abortion in that my personal viewpoint is that it's none of my fucking business whether a woman chooses to terminate a pregnancy or not.

Here's my most important point, though: If you're one of those people who stand in city centers holding up signs saying 'God Hates Fags', or one of those people who are calling Obama a 'Nazi' over the health-care bill…I think you are totally retarded.

I mean that. I honestly do. If you're against the Healthcare bill, I honestly worry that people as retarded and easily led as you are actually members of society. If you're a Bible-bashing, fire and brimstone 'repent sinners' religious fundamentalist, I wonder how pathetically sad your life must be for you to claw so desperately at such nonsensical fantasy in order to feel like you have power.

I think someone should slap the shit out of the 14 year old moms (and the 14 year old fathers). I think religion is a pointless waste of time that does more harm than good…

Long story short, I believe lots of things that you don't.What *I* consider to be acceptable or unacceptable probably doesn't line up with your views on the subject.

But here's the thing…this is absolutely fine…and we appear to have forgotten that.

There are Six Billion people on this planet. Six billion different people from seven different continents, around 200 different countries and literally thousands of different cultures and sub-cultures.

Then, sometime since World War 2, we decided that when we interact with each other, it's completely and totally unacceptable to disagree or offend each other on any scale.

Basically, we live in a world where you can lose your job for telling that really annoying co-worker that he's really annoying or telling the boss that you think his idea is fucking stupid. Where it's not politically correct for a Christian to wish a fellow Christian a Merry Christmas within earshot of other people, in case one of them isn't Christian.

I think that this should stop. I think we should become a plain speaking society instead of a politically correct one.

Don't get me wrong, one of the things that really fucking annoys me is people who are just rude, assholes who love being dicks by claiming that they're just speaking their mind. Let's just say there's a difference between taking the stinky co-worker aside and saying 'Listen dude, you smell. Buy some deodorant and take a few more showers because people are starting to talk.' Than standing up and shouting "UGH! YOU FUCKING STINK!" in a crowded room.

Secondly, it's time for the world, as a whole, to grow a sense of fucking humor. You can go through the Bill of Rights with a fine tooth comb, but I can tell you right now, there's nothing in there that says you have the right to never be offended. Some of you may be offended by some of the language I am using in his post. Well, I am quite happy to say that if you don't like it, you are more than welcome to go fuck yourselves with that stick you have firmly lodged up your ass and get the fuck over it.…and if it really offends you, you are welcome to stop fucking reading and go read something that doesn't offend you.

So, in this spirit, I hereby proclaim 2010 to be the year of plain speaking, where everyone should speak their fucking minds.

I have news for everyone. You were once pushed headfirst out of someone's vagina, and spent the next couple of years regularly shitting in your pants. You're not special, you don't deserve special treatment and all this talk of 'morality' and 'dignity' is nothing but a rationalization as to why everyone should behave in a way that doesn't offend you.


Woman atop her Soapbox said...


While some of our views disagree, I can respect your views and not be offended by them.

We have gone too far with politically correct and not far enough with a little basic manners and respect of each other.

And Merry Christmas by way !


Evan 08 said...

Fuck Yeah, buddy.

Anonymous said...

YES! oh, Yes! oh, fucking Yes!

Anonymous said...


Humor is what keeps us sane when the roof is falling down around our ears. Its what makes the world stop running around doing pointless stuff and returns a little bit of life to them.

God bless, brother. Merry Christmas!!