I'll Just Buy You ONE Present

Christmas is different when you’re a (shudder) grown up.

First of all, there’s a lot more stress, and you actually have to do stuff. You know, Christmas shop, cook, organize things. When you’re a kid the biggest problem you face is whether to open the big present first, or save it until last.

Even your choice of gifts change. Take me for example. Once I’d scratched the ‘un-doable’ presents of the list (IE, the 80” Plasma TV, the Dodge Viper and the Harley-Davidson Fatboy), I was left with two main things:

1. A DVD Labeller.


2. DVD boxes.

Yeah, I know, I got my ‘toy’ (the graphics pad) before Christmas, but when I realized I’d asked for things to keep stuff I already own neat and tidy, even I was shocked. I mean, like, Holy Crap! News like that would give my Mum a heart attack.

Yes, I have to admit the magic of the Christmas season has faded a little for me. Don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas, but I’d give my back teeth to be 7 years old again, lying in bed on Christmas Eve, straining my ears listening for Santa.

I also miss the Christmas traditions, my favourite of which was my Dad hiding my ‘main’ Christmas present behind the sofa every single year. I think every year he thought “Well, I’ve hid them there for the past 6 years, so this year they’re BOUND to think I’ve hidden it somewhere else.”

Ah, the old Christmas fakeout. “You didn’t get everything you wanted? Oh, wait! What’s this behind the couch?”

Wow, Dad, what a shocker. It wasn’t long before me and my brother would come downstairs on Christmas day and make a beeline for the couch.

Anyhoo…

Unfortunately, I’m also one of the unfortunate 25% of the population that suffers from CCTB syndrome, that’s Christmas-Close-To-Birthday syndrome, for those of you who have never heard of it.

People who have their birthday in November, December or January have problems. Let me explain this. My Birthday is on January 23rd. Less than one month after Christmas day. This gives me the following problems:

1. Because Christmas and my Birthday are within a month of each other, I have 11 months of the year with nothing to look forward to.


2. Everyone is short of cash after Christmas, so my birthday presents suffer.

However, the absolute worst thing that bugged the ever living crap out of me growing up was hearing the following from almost every Aunt and Uncle I had:

“Well, seeing as your Birthday is so close to Christmas, we’ll just get you a big Christmas present that will count for both.”

Translation : “I’ll get you a Christmas present, but if you think I’m springing for two gifts so close together, you’ve got another thing coming.”

As an adult, I can understand this. As a 6 year old, it was bloody annoying.

Saying that, however, there are a few members of my family that are absolute stars when it comes to gifts. Like my Uncle Joe and Auntie Les, who used to buy me a Beano or Dandy annual (That’s a British comic book) every year for Christmas.

I mentioned a few years ago that I really missed getting them now that I was ‘grown up’.

Guess what? A copy of the 2006 Beano Annual arrived all the way from England today. Yay, Auntie Les!

My Uncle Joe was also great because he constantly forgot everyone’s Birthdays, meaning at random intervals he’d just go out and buy a stack of toys to play catch-up. Unexpected gifts tend to be 100 times better.

Anyway, just in case anyone’s interested, this year for my birthday I would like a Mustek PL-607 portable DVD player with 7.5” LCD screen, with progressive scan and Video CD and DVD-R compatibility, priced a very reasonable $99.99 at CompUSA (After $30 instant savings).

Bear in mind that that’s just around 55GBP. Cough Parents, Cough, Hint, hint. Full amount preferable, but any donations gladly accepted.

They say it’s better to give than to receive, I’ve always been a very selfless person, so I’m happy to take the short end of the stick and receive so everyone else can give (Which is so much better).