Monday, January 18, 2010

Batting the Eyelashes.

So a few days ago, I found myself standing in the checkout line of my local Gamestop with a pre-owned copy of Resident Evil 5 in my hands.

"Resident Evil 5!" Said the way too enthusiastic check out girl. "Raaaarrrr!"

I gave a polite laugh. Sunny was waiting in the car. I just wanted to pay and leave.

"Would you like to buy a protection plan for your game?" She asked, smiling at me like a maniac. "In case it gets scratched up? It's only seven bucks."

"Nah." I said. "It's not worth it a twenty dollar game."

"Awwww." She said, acting like I'd told her she couldn't have the pony I'd promised her. After pouting for a few seconds she snapped back to her massive grin and said "…Well, would you like to pre-order anything?"

"No thanks." I said, trying to project total disinterest. Come on you dozy bint! I'm in a hurry and just want to go, can't you sense that?

"Oh, come on!" She said with a giggle. "You just have to put a few bucks down and you're guaranteed a copy on release day!"

"No thanks." I said, pointing to the copy of Resident Evil 5. "There's a reason I only buy pre-owned games."

"Ah!" She said, putting the heels of her hands on the counter and leaning forward…basically putting her cleavage into 'turbo' mode. "Then can I interest you in a discount card?"

At this point the one and one that had been vaguely floating around in my head clicked together and came up with a big, bright neon 2.

After just barely managing to suppress a laugh, I leaned in and whispered:

"Sweetheart, I know that you're probably this stores top salesperson with a routine like that, but if you'd taken a glance at the ring finger on my left hand, you wouldn't have had to waste your time."

She smiled and shrugged. "You should see my pre-order figures." She said.

I'm still not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed.


Evan 08 said...

Oh shizzle... that's pretty funny.

rayray said...

sounds like she uses HER figure to get high sales figures........wonder how many guys leave with a little "extra" after talking to her......

Anonymous said...

Damn, I need to learn that trick! Might make my job a bit easier. did you take video?