Monday, August 07, 2006

The Firefox Bathroom Companion

Well, I think I’ve finally done it. I’ve come up with the invention that’s going to make me millions.

If you’re anything like me, you run Firefox on your computer, and have taken advantage of the ‘tabbed browsing’ feature.

Also, if you’re anything like me, you take advantage of the ‘open in tabs’ feature for your favorites.

For those who have no clue what I’m talking about, let me explain (although this should be unnecessary at this point). Tabbed browsing means instead of opening each new page in a new window, it opens all the pages in the same window and you click on tabs at the top of the window to switch between the pages.

Make sense? It’s easier, doesn’t clutter your desktop, and allows a single click to close all the pages at once (which is really handy when you’re looking at porn and your mom walks in.)

So I have all my blogs in one favorites folder, all my webcomics in another etc, etc. Then, I just go to that folder and click ‘open in tabs’, which opens all these pages at once, tabbed for my perusing pleasure.

So let’s get to my invention.

How many times have you sat in front of your computer, pulled up all your favorite blogs, webcomics or daily news sites…only to suddenly feel the ‘call of nature’.

It’s the height of the human dilemma. Do you wait, and read your blogs while shuffling in your chair, fighting the turtle’s head? Do you go to the bathroom, causing yourself to wait to read your blogs or comics?

As everyone knows, starting to read one thing, then being forced to switch to something else due to its paper-portability nature can throw your whole day out of whack. Reading your webcomics, then being forced to switch to John Grisham while you’re sitting on the porcelain throne, then switching back to webcomics can leave you filled with disgust and an odd sense of foreboding.

Obviously, if you have a laptop and a wireless connection, this isn’t such a big problem…but who wants to carry a laptop into the bathroom? It’s unwieldy and not really designed to be used in a buttock-toiletseat interface situation.

There’s a gap in the market.

So, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the “Firefox Bathroom Companion!”

Imagine a laptop screen. That’s what it looks like. To keep prices down, it has a small amount of memory, doesn’t require much battery power, and works like this:

You sit at the computer, open your tabs and the call of nature grabs you. Quickly, you grab your FBC and with a single mouse click (provided by a Firefox plugin), the contents of your tabs are flashed across to your FBC via an infrared link.

While it can’t hold much, it can hold around 10-15 web pages, which is plenty enough to ‘hold you over’ on that bathroom visit… and transfers the data fast enough to save you from accidents.

No ‘touching cloth’ while you’re waiting for the FBC to receive your pages, or your money back.

You know you want one.


rayray said...

You've thought about this long and hard, haven't you?

MC Etcher said...

You lost me at 'fighting the turtle's head', because I was laughing too much.

MC Etcher said...


(Beevis and Butthead laughter)

OzzyC said...

Ummmm.... what about changing tabs? Touch screen? Ewwwwww!

Kato said...

Mmmm... bathroom browsing...

Paulius said...

RayRay : Yes. Yes I have

Etcher : How juvenile. (Hur hur, 'Hard')

OzzyC : The device would have a single button that works like a mousewheel. Click to change tab, spin to scroll. It would be self-sanitising.

Kato : Yup, the old shit 'n' surf