One of those days.

Ever had one of those days?

The day before yesterday I had a good day. I climb into bed, and fall into a nice deep, restful sleep.

I awake 30 minutes later with what feels like bombs being exploded in my guts.

So I spent all night getting out of bed every 15 minutes with what can politely be called ‘Gastric Problems’. (The none polite description is ‘The Green Apple Splatters’, ‘The Screamin’ Wildy’s’ or for the traditionalists out there… ‘The Shits’.)

Not a fun way to spend an evening, as I’m sure you know.

I finally get to sleep at about 8am.

I’m awoken at 9:30 by Buddy howling his head off. Sunny said she would probably be in late from work, so I assumed he’d either got caught up in something, trying to escape from behind the baby gate, or needed to go really badly.

Cursing, I get up, get dressed, and walk into the living room. Sunny’s sitting on the couch.

“What’s with the dog?” I ask.

“He got into the trash, so I’m punishing him.”

I mentally curse myself because when I told Sunny to punish him that way, and don’t let him out no matter how much he whines…I forgot to add: “Unless I’m asleep after being up all night with Explosive Ass Syndrome.”

Well, I figure that if I’m out of bed, I’m out of bed. With the dog awake and running around, I wasn’t going to get much sleep anyway.

I sit on the couch and try to relax. While the worst had passed, I was still feeling a little queasy.

Later that afternoon, I decide I might feel better if I eat something, so I make a pizza.

I have to admit, it was a work of art. Three different cheeses, chicken, mushroom, bacon and all the right herbs and spices. Yum.

I sit down on the couch and take a big ‘ole bite of pizza. It was great.

It was at this point that buddy decided to walk into the living room. Sit in front of me…and throw up.

Now normally I have an extremely strong stomach. I don’t get seasick, airsick, carsick nor do I go green around puke or filled diapers.

Not so today.

I put my pizza down. After what I’d just seen, I wasn’t going to be finishing it…then I had to clean up the doggy-puke.

Imagine a fucked up relay race.

Walk towards the sick, retch, run outside for fresh air…repeat.

Luckily I managed to get through the whole thing without losing what little pizza I’d already eaten.

…and I won’t be eating pizza for a while.